I feel your long fingers trying to take hold of me, trying to suffocate me. You bring despair and remove all hope, trying to convince me that there is nothing left for me in this life. But you are lying. I have things to live for, I deserve to be here. I want to be … Continue reading Standing up to suicide
For too long you have longingly searched for freedom; it eludes you still. Yet once more you look across the vast expanse, seeking comfort in solitude, not realising that this desolate place is the reflection of your heart. Before I sought help, I chose to isolate myself and pretend that all was well. Writing has … Continue reading Seek help
Did you know that you are loved, and not a burden? That you are beautiful, and valuable? That you are not a mistake, but have a purpose? Did you know that you are not a failure, but have accomplished so much? That your opinion is important, and your voice needs to be heard? That you … Continue reading If you’re struggling
"How are you doing?" Something that is asked all the time, but all too often is answered with half-truths. "I'm fine" is far easier than admitting vulnerability, hurt, depression, and loneliness. Honestly, I don't know how I'm doing. What would you like me to say? "Everything is good, thanks"? That's not true, not really. Do … Continue reading How are you doing, really?
What trouble was tormenting your soul? So many times I thought you were doing well, because you said you were. Is there anything I could have said, or done? Is there any way I could have changed the outcome of your struggles? An emptiness has filled me; disbelief that you are no longer with us. … Continue reading When a friend takes his life
Vultures circling overhead, watching me, waiting for the final moment. Weary through so much fighting, I lie there on the ground no longer caring. Anxiety has whittled me down to the core, exposing each and every weakness. And yet, the remnants of the warrior spirit remain. A dying flame, evidence of what once was. Time … Continue reading Today is not the end
Nearly 2 months have passed since I last wanted to go back to self-harming, or had suicidal thoughts. It's amazing how quickly time passes when it feels as though you're coasting through life, rather than struggling, and trying to find something positive in each day has made a significant difference to how I feel about … Continue reading 230 days free of self-harm